This week Bobbi Conner talks with Dr. Sara Ritchie about helping children learn to manage or regulate their emotions. Dr. Ritchie is an Associate Professor of Pediatrics and a pediatrician at MUSC Children’s Health.
Conner: I'm Bobbi Conner for South Carolina Public Radio with Health Focus here at the radio studio for the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston. Parents, teachers, and other caregivers have an important role to play in helping children learn to manage or regulate their emotions. Doctor Sara Richie is here to talk about the details. Doctor Richie is an Associate Professor of Pediatrics, and she's a pediatrician at MUSC Children's Health. Doctor Richie, what are the short term and long-term benefits for kids when they learn practical skills to recognize and then also handle their emotions?
Dr. Ritchie: Really, the biggest goal is that we're trying to build resiliency in our children. And so, when we as parents or caregivers create positive experiences and we give safe, stable relationships, we're really setting our children up to develop skills to effectively handle those emotions, problem solve and develop healthy relationships with others. And those skills translate into their adult lives.
Conner: And at what age can parents begin to talk with their children about emotions like frustration, sadness, anger, and then maybe help their kids learn some healthy, age appropriate ways to manage those emotions?
Dr. Ritchie: Honestly, there really isn't an age that's too young. And, I think at the very least for parents or caregivers, it's important to start just practicing that idea of naming the emotions. So even a 12-month-old, a 15-month-old, you can go ahead and say, you hit me, that's because you're frustrated. Or, I see that you're angry right now, or I see that you're sad right now. It helps them learn to name their own emotion, and the quicker they can recognize what emotion they're having, they can hopefully select from a set of skills to help regulate that emotion.
Conner: What are some of the concrete strategies or tips for parents to help kids manage emotions?
Dr. Ritchie: There are several things that you can think about, but first of all, I have to mention the importance of sleep. It is really paramount to promote healthy sleep habits, because we really can't expect to manage our own emotions well when we haven't had sufficient rest. And then kind of along those lines, just routines in general are really helpful to lay a foundation for stability so that you can have healthy emotional regulation. So bedtime routines, homework, chores, cleanup, mealtime, all routines that can be really helpful.
Conner: Are there some tips that you can suggest for parents to do a little bit of emotional coaching with their kids?
Dr. Ritchie: Yes, there are very specific steps to going through emotional coaching. It starts with acknowledging the emotion. So for example, I see that you're having really big feelings right now. The next step is naming the emotion. So I can see that you look angry. The next step is validating the emotion. It's completely okay to feel angry right now. And then the last thing you want to do is you want to meet the need of the emotion. So for example, provide comfort, provide space, security, kindness, all of those things to address the need of the emotion. And that just walks you through the steps of emotional coaching.
Conner: And is that appropriate for all ages of kids? We might use different language, but the toddlers and preschoolers and the teenagers?
Dr. Ritchie: Absolutely. Emotional coaching is a wonderful way to address all age groups: toddlers, school-age children, and teens. And you can follow the same steps for all the age groups.
Conner: Doctor Ritchie, thanks for this information about helping children learn to manage emotions.
Dr. Ritchie: You're welcome.
Conner: From the radio studio for the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston, I'm Bobbi Conner for South Carolina Public Radio.
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