Each day, close to 24 million women across the country head out to work after tending to their children. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, working moms account for nearly one-third of all employed women.
Tabitha Safdi is a mom and the Senior Director of Audio and Digital Operations for SCETV and SC Public Radio. Safdi’s mother, Deborah Lewis, was also a working mom.
In 2024, Safdi and Lewis sat down with StoryCorps to reflect on striking a balance between professional achievement and successful parenting.
TRANSCRIPT:
Safdi: Another thing that I feel like we have in common is that we are, or were, both working moms.
Lewis: Yeah.
Safdi: What were the hardest moments that you had when I was growing up as it relates to work-life balance?
Lewis: Hmm. I don't know, that balance is overrated (laughs). I don't…that's hard. And I know…yeah. I think that at the moment we feel panicked when we can't be there all the time. We can't be in the house, or we can't be at that event that you're at. That was hard. That was the really hard place because you, yeah, workplaces were not as, I guess, understanding, and I was very an overachiever. And I wanted to be the best at what I was doing, and at times, not as wise as I am now. And so, I missed a lot of things with all of you, I think. Even being at home cooking dinner. I didn’t--I'm not a cook. I'm not like Mom.
Safdi: We ate a lot of mac & cheese.
Lewis: You ate a lot of mac & cheese, yes, you did.
Safdi: Well, I think I asked you that question mostly because I'm kind of going through the same things. You know, the kids are getting a little bit older now, but the same thing, like being a high achiever. I do feel like I’m missing out a good bit. So, I guess my next question to you would be, if you could do everything over again, would you do it differently?
Lewis: Oh, yeah. I mean, it's silly. I think someone says they won't because there's a lot of mistakes along the way. And maybe that's why I love spending time with your kids. I now have the opportunity to do that where I didn't have it as much with you. So, between guilt and, “Yeah, I wish I'd have spent more time, wish I would have had the wisdom that I have now” to say, “No matter what, go. No matter how you feel, go. No matter how tired you are, go. No matter what the boss says, go.” You know, I don't know what you guys would have been. I don't want any of you to be different. I love you the way you are and all the things that you've achieved. I'm very proud of you. So, I don't know what I would change. I know I'd like to have been there more. But again, it's made you who you are now.
Safdi: That's true. I don't think I would change anything about it. I think the other thing, too, is maybe that the kids were hard on you. More so than Dad, even, because we didn't really have parents in the house all the time because you and dad worked all the time. And maybe we were mad about that to a certain extent, but I think now, being a parent and having that same drive, I get it honestly, that I think, looking back now, that I feel bad that we were so hard on you.
Lewis: No, no. Because you made me who I am, so...
Safdi: Yeah.
Lewis: I think it works both ways.
Safdi: Thank you for being my mom. And thank you for being a great grandma to my kids.
Lewis: Yeah.
Safdi: And, I love you.
Lewis: I love you, too, sweetie.
